Home / blog / Just for fun: collection of dreadful DMs from FetLife

Just for fun: collection of dreadful DMs from FetLife

Following up my posts around FetLife and setting up an account, see Joining the kink community part 1 and part 2, I thought of sharing something just for giggles.

Here are some messages I have received on FL that are simply dreadful. Sharing so you know you are not alone...

xxxxXXX 42M Switch

hello How are you

Master of conversations?

 

MrRightXXXX 28M Exploring

Hey sexy u from london

Honestly, is that how you talk?
XXXXDomesticSub 36M slave

Please may we speak ? X

No.

 

MrBlackXXXX 31M Bull

May I say something miss ?

Too dull.

 

kittyboyXXXXXX 24M Exploring

Hi

Ya basic.

 

dark_soulXXX 42M Switch

Wow I’d love you to fuck and abuse me ?

Needy.

 

XxxxxboyXXXXXX 73M Princess

How do you feel about a little bratty hyper horny sis spying on her big thick hung older bro?

That’s your opening line?
xxxXXXXXX 25M sub

Hi How are you Iam XXXXX live in London since three years in Brixton I am looking for a mistress to server her feet iam crazy about girl’s feet I love sniff and licking them every day specially after gym or when they are sweaty or stink I can do every thing you will make u happy

(7 weeks later)

xxxXXXXXX 25M sub

Hi How are you Iam XXXXX live in London since three years in Brixton I am looking for a mistress to server her feet iam crazy about girl’s feet I love sniff and licking them every day specially after gym or when they are sweaty or stink I can do every thing you will make u happy

Grammar.  Grammar.

 

subXXXXXX 42M Exploring

Love Your writing ‘ghosting’. It’s actually also happening at work where people are working remotely.

You might want to learn to use Urban Dictionary.

 

MascxxxXXXXXX 32M babyboy

Liking your profile.
Ive had very little experience on here.
Met one girl who turned out to be a very nasty piece of work.
Worst year of my life and list all my money and belongings. So the only way is up for me ??

How’s it all been going on here for you? Xx

Am not your therapist.

 

caramexxxx 30M Exploring

Hey is this kinky tiger open to bbc xx

Only the news type.
xxxXXX 28M Switch

Hi. How are you today?
Are you into ballbusting?

(1 week later)

xxXXX 28M Switch

Hi. How are you today?

Would you like to explore ballbusting?

A week goes by, and I see no improvements.
masterXXXXXXX 48M Master

welcome to BDSM, how are u? what did attract u to bdsm? liberating? challenge? trust? leave controle? receive pain or soft humiliation?
i am Master XXX, dom since 2000, u?

Too many questions.

 

Auxxxxx 48M Exploring

Hey,
Hope you are doing well.
You are so inspiring model that I want you to pose for me.
I am looking to explore eroticism, sensuality and desire reveal by the female body.

Sketchy and disturbing.
XXXXX 30M Dom

Hey babe
How are youb? I like your profile and I am interested to meet up.
I am open minded, high sex drive and up for trying new things.
Would you be interested to meet up ?

Sounds rapey.
BetacuckoldXXXX 39M sub

Am so sorry for bothering you.Is there any chance Goddess like you would let tiny cock loser like me worship her and pamper her feet?

(2 weeks later)

BetacuckoldXXXX 39M sub

Am so sorry for bothering you.Is there any chance Goddess like you would let tiny cock loser like me worship her and pamper her feet?

Didn’t work the first time, and decided to use the exact same opening line again?
XXXXluv 37M Switch

Hi, would you like to meet?

*Archives message*
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kinkytiger

Blogger of kink, fetish, and more. London-based millennial, sharing a BDSM journey.