More about pegging!

I know I’ve said the pegger is generally a woman, however there is no need to feel restricted by traditional gender binary standards. You can be belong to any shade in the gender spectrum and still peg you partner, SO, FWB, etc.

Consent here is key, although this is often suggested or initiated by the pegee, make sure that also the pegger is on board. The most important thing I’d recommend, it’s to initiate the conversation with your partner outside of sex. This removes the pressure and stress of feeling coerced into doing it on the spot, and provide them with extra time to research the topic and do some reading.

Whatever the case, you can bring it up by sharing an article, some relevant clips of porn (only if you have that kind of openness), or maybe sending them a picture from reddit femdom for inspiration.

6 men revealing why they love getting pegged during sex

14 women reveal why pegging men turns them on

(articles published on Men’s Health last year)

Let’s go through some three points for the ‘before’:

• Toys. Let’s start small, literally. You need a harness and some small dildos to start with, ideally with a flat base. I would suggest buying different sizes and work your way up. Butt plugs in different sizes are also an option for training purposes (there are also vibrating butt plugs) and some harnesses have space for a bullet vibrator for the pegger’s pleasure. I have included some options below 😉
• Things to keep handy. If you are… erm.. sharing the dildos, I recommend using condoms for the dildos for hygienic reasons. Lube-wise you can get a water or a silicon base, generally silicon base is recommended for anal, but you might have a preference. Either way, so long as it’s not a numbing lube you are good (you do not want to numb anything there). Gloves if you want to give the pegee an anal massage beforehand, and a towel too as lube tends to get everywhere.
• Choose the right time of the day to do it or use a douche. Ideally the pegee should had a recent, clean bowel movement, followed by a wash with a small anal douche and a shower to freshen things up. This should avoid any poop accidents, thou be aware that this can happen anyway. Make sure you also have either condoms, gloves, or wet wipes handy. Or all of the above.

During your session, keep another three things in mind:

• Prostate foreplay. You can start with some external massage, maybe with some lube. The prostate is located between the anus and the balls, and it’s massageable through the perineum, so that’s pretty easy to find. You can use your your fingers or knuckles, and press against the skin and massage in whatever motion works best for your partner (rotation, up and down, pulsing, etc), everyone is different after all, so check with your partner! You might notice the prostate getting a little bigger and firmer, that happens when aroused. 
• Anal foreplay. Next, you can have a play with the butthole, definitely with lube. You can do the same as you did with the prostate, and massage it or press on it with your fingers or knuckles. You can also push on the butthole’s lip to help the muscles relax, check regularly with your partner, and then once he is ready, you can start with a small dildo/butt plug. Occasionally remind him to breathe. 
• Getting ready for the strap-on. Once your partners is ready to move up to a bigger toys/butt plugs, then you might be ready for the strap-on. There are various positions you can try, here is an illustrate list (my fav is #2), you can do the humping or you can let your partner move on top of you. You can add a bullet vibrator inside your harness, or a cock ring on your dildo for extra vibes. Communication here is key, check with your partner what works, position, speed, intensity, etc.

After your session, the only thing you need to worry is Aftercare.

Give each other a cuddle, have intercourse sex, order some take out, whatever works for you! Remember, if something didn’t go according to plans, you can always try again, and again and again until you are both equally satisfied with the results 🙂 so long as you take a break in between sessions!