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More about pegging!

Not long ago, I wrote about the Pegging 101 online workshop, run by Killing Kittens (see their Hedonism party review here).

Today I wanted to cover pegging in a little more details, so I present you: MORE ABOUT PEGGING!

Let’s start with the basics, and then expand a little:

The what and the who: pegging is when a woman (the pegger) penetrates a man anally (the pegee), with the use of a strap-on

They why doing it: takes the pressure away from the penis, allows the pegger to pleasure the pegee in a whole different way

The how: preparation for before, during, after, and some tips

Let’s start with the first one. The what and the who.

I know I’ve said the pegger is generally a woman, however there is no need to feel restricted by traditional gender binary standards. You can be belong to any shade in the gender spectrum and still peg you partner, SO, FWB, etc.

Consent here is key, although this is often suggested or initiated by the pegee, make sure that also the pegger is on board. The most important thing I’d recommend, it’s to initiate the conversation with your partner outside of sex. This removes the pressure and stress of feeling coerced into doing it on the spot, and provide them with extra time to research the topic and do some reading.

Whatever the case, you can bring it up by sharing an article, some relevant clips of porn (only if you have that kind of openness), or maybe sending them a picture from reddit femdom for inspiration.

Next, the why doing it.

I mentioned above a couple of reasons, but here are a couple of others from the pegee POV

  • Some guys enjoy it because the orgasms feel stronger and quite different from traditional ones; some men compare it to what a woman’s orgasm probably feels like, being a whole body experience instead of being quite localised.
  • The reverse power dynamic! This is a great turn on for guys who want to have that extra intimacy and openness with their partner, while focusing on the pegee’s pleasure and removing any performance-related anxieties they might have (what? a millennial having anxiety??? nonsense! *sobs a little*).
  • Submissive tendencies? Yep, this is perfect for you! 

So let’s look at it from a pegger POV (some are my own personal views): 

  • (him on top, cowboy) Watch your play-partner sink further onto your strap-on, while riding you at a pace and rhythm that pleases him; also BONUS since you have full nipples/bum access.
  • (you behind him) Look at how your play-partner squirms with pleasure after every thrust, and watch him leaning into you as you slap him ass while doing it.
  • Shall we talk about how FUN is to have a penis? I kinda get what some of the fuss is about! Although I still struggle with the walking and sitting down part… where do you put it? How?
  • Domme tendencies? Yep, this is perfect for you! 

NSFW

Romancing the prostate

Let’s look into the how

Let’s go through some key points for the ‘before’:

1.  Toys. Let’s start small, literally. You need a harness and some small dildos to start with, ideally with a flat base. I would suggest buying different sizes and work your way up. Butt plugs in different sizes are also an option for training purposes (there are also vibrating butt plugs) and some harnesses have space for a bullet vibrator for the pegger’s pleasure. I have included some options below 😉

2.  Things to keep handy. If you are… erm.. sharing the dildos, I recommend using condoms for the dildos for hygienic reasons. Lube-wise you can get a water or a silicon base, generally silicon base is recommended for anal, but you might have a preference. Either way, so long as it’s not a numbing lube you are good (you do not want to numb anything there). Gloves if you want to give the pegee an anal massage beforehand, and a towel too as lube tends to get everywhere.

3.  Choose the right time of the day to do it. Ideally the pegee should had a recent, clean bowel movement, followed by a wash with a small anal douche and a shower to freshen things up. This should avoid any poop accidents, thou as I mentioned before, you can always have either condoms, gloves, or wet wipes handy. Or all of the above.

During your session, keep a couple of things in mind:

1.  Prostate foreplay. You can start with some external massage, maybe with some lube. The prostate is located between the anus and the balls, and it’s massageable through the perineum, so that’s pretty easy to find. You can use your your fingers or knuckles, and press against the skin and massage in whatever motion works best for your partner (rotation, up and down, pulsing, etc), everyone is different after all, so check with your partner! You might notice the prostate getting a little bigger and firmer, that happens when aroused. 

2.  Anal foreplay. Next, you can have a play with the butthole, definitely with lube. You can do the same as you did with the prostate, and massage it or press on it with your fingers or knuckles. You can also push on the butthole’s lip to help the muscles relax, check regularly with your partner, and then once he is ready, you can start with a small dildo/butt plug. Occasionally remind him to breathe. 

3.  Getting ready for the strap-on. Once your partners is ready to move up to a bigger toys/butt plugs, then you might be ready for the strap-on. There are various positions you can try, here is an illustrate list (my fav is #7), you can do the humping or you can let your partner move on top of you. Communication here is key, check with your partner what works, position, speed, intensity, etc., and… Have fun with it!

After your session, there is only thing you need to worry: Aftercare.

Give each other a cuddle, have intercourse sex, order some take out, whatever works for you! Remember, if something didn’t go according to plans, you can always try again, and again and again until you are both equally satisfied with the results 🙂 so long as you take a break in between sessions!

If you need any suggestions on toys, I have added here below some recommendations, of course feel free to do your own research, and…. have fun with it!

The high-end harness with two vibe bullet spaces, personally recommend: SpareParts Joque

Some basic butt plugs/dildos for training (you can upgrade once you know what you like): Buttr Bootcamp

If you are unsure of what shape works for you, also incluse an anal duche and a bullet vibrator: Bumper Booty Bundle

More budget harness, it has good reviews, and it comes with dildos and bullet vibrator: Strap-On Kit

If you fancy some vibes, to help you relax: Vibrating Butt Plug

For the pegger’s pleasure, put in the harnesses pockets or in a hollow dildo: Bullet Vibrator

I hope this inspired you to try it, I think we all need to peg someone in our lives at least once 🙂 

Fun Fact!

In the late 1800s butt plugs used to be sold as a ‘miracle cure’ for headaches and acne. Full article.